Keeping the Disney Magic Alive: How Honoring My “Inner Child” Has Been A Therapy All In Itself

“Hi, I’m Emily, and I am a Disney-a-holic”

There… I said it. No shame.

For those who know me, they know that, indeed, I do love Disney. In the past two years I’ve been to Walt Disney World four times and Disneyland once. I have run two marathons, owned an Annual Pass, have taken hundreds of pictures, visited many friends and cast members, eaten a few too many foods shaped like Mickey Mouse, and have shamelessly gone to Character breakfast at least five times. To some, I’m full-blown obsessed, but to more avid Disney lovers, my level of fondness is mild at best. Working at a children’s hospital, I receive my daily dose of Disney every single shift. Anna, Elsa, Moana, and Belle have become official members of my Girl Gang as of late, and you bet I hang with them every chance I get. I’ve seen Frozen, Moana, Coco, Beauty and the Beast, Cars, and Finding Nemo at least five times this week alone, and I can’t pass more than a few rooms without hearing a Disney song playing. And in the rare occurence when I don’t get my usual Disney fix,  you bet I will somehow find a way to incorporate it into my nursing routine. I never miss an opportunity to perform “Let It Go”, and you better believe I make that room freeze. In those moments I am Elsa and I’m honestly surprised that Disney hasn’t reached out to me to perform for them (Side-note: I’m so glad that none of my coworkers have caught me mid performance. I’m sure they’ll wonder who made the executive decision to hire me.).

Many would assume that my love for Disney stemmed from a childhood filled with trips to the “Happiest Place on Earth” and that I’ve always been a die-hard Disney Princess at heart. After all, I did grow up singing along to those classic 1990’s movies that everyone knows and loves. And while that true I always “liked” Disney, I never really understood the obsession with it, especially people sans children. Why would anyone freely and willingly choose to fly to Orlando to vacation at Walt Disney World, in often oppressive heat, spend ungodly amounts of money, and be in a crammed theme park with small restless, screaming children for “fun”? I have close friend’s whose family vacations consisted of extended Disney trips with 20+ people all in matching shirts, looking like they were having the time of their lives in 92 degree heat with 100% humidity! (literally, no one was visibly sweating in their pictures and I’m still surprised how they pulled that off). I couldn’t wrap my head around what magical spell Mickey Mouse seemed to place on everyone who entered his world, and why year after year, more and more people I knew were flocking down to sunny Florida, posing ever so cutely in ears in front of Cinderella’s Castle. It wasn’t until I went to Walt Disney World as an adult that I understood the allure of this place and how powerful it could be.

It all started around three years ago when I decided that I was going to become a runner. I had vowed to myself that a marathon was too much and that there was absolutely no way I would, or could, accomplish something like that. Sure, I had gone from someone who could barely run a couple of laps to a runner who was placing 4th in a few local races, but a MARATHON… no way Jose. 26.2 miles of consistent movement and chafing seemed like a daunting task at the time, with little reward for maximal efforts. I was starting to plateau in my training and I needed to find something that would motivate me enough to train, yet keep me incentivized to actually follow through with the process. It wasn’t until I had stumbled upon the Disney Race series and the Disney Marathon Weekend that I had unintentionally found what I was looking for. I thought that having a “run-cation” to Disney would not only be fun, but a well-earned reward to myself for putting in the hard work. I could mix business with pleasure and escaping the January cold for a week was an added bonus!  After long deliberation, I decided to sign up for the full marathon the day spots were released to the public due to it costing the exact same as the half marathon because WHY PAY $180 TO RUN 13.1 MILES WHEN YOU CAN PAY THE SAME AND RUN 26.2?! IT’S ECONOMICS! With a click of the mouse, I had fully committed myself to trudging 26.2 miles with the main mouse himself, and there was no turning back. Little did I know that this trip would change so much for me and open up a door to a world I would soon know and love.

Although I had fallen deeper in love with running, almost to the point of obsession, in the next nine months leading up to my marathon, the final stretch prior to the race was full of lots of hardships. In the month and a half leading up to the trip, I had broken up with my significant other who was supposed to be attending the race with me, and was feeling sad that I would have to attend my “Magical Vacation” Han Solo. In addition, work had been unprecedentedly grim, often as the holiday season can be, and I was feeling quite down due to poor patient outcomes. I entered 2017 in a bit of a funk, yet hopeful that a dose of Vitamin D from the Florida sun and a nice long jog through Disney could somehow shake my seasonal blues. To my surprise, and in a pinch, my mother decided to tag along on my trip, bound and determined that no daughter of her’s would run a race alone and with no one to cheer her on. The trade-off for her company was that in return, we would ride The Haunted Mansion just as she did when she visited in 1978. My mother had given me an offer I couldn’t refuse, and before I knew it I was boarding a plane to Orlando with the biggest smile on my face, ready to tackle on the 26.2 miles and spend time with my best friend. I was sure that the race weekend would be one for the books… and boy was I in for a real treat…

For those who don’t know, Disney Marathon Weekend 2017 was the worst weather on record. Not only did the Half Marathon on Saturday get cancelled due to lightning and rain, but that night, an unexpected cold front came through, leaving us with sub 30 degree weather for marathon morning. Mom and I ran to the local Orlando Wal-Mart just hours before the race hoping to find “warm weather” clothing that is so abundantly sold in southern Florida. No no ones surprise, everyone and their sister had already perused the shelves and taken anything and everything remotely warm and in my size. I ended up running the first five miles of the race in a pair of oversized sweatpants, an oversized sweatshirt, and fuzzy socks doubled as my gloves. Luckily my Princess Leia headband acted as makeshift ear muffs and I continued to blast Disney sing along hits to distract me from the frigid temperatures.  As the miles tacked on and the sun was starting to rise, I began to warm up and ditched my “groutfit” on Main Street of Magic Kingdom. I was headed straight for Cinderella’s Castle and knew that soon enough I would be running through it, experiencing the thrill of the crowd and start of my runner’s high. As I stopped to take a picture to commemorate my Mile 7 accomplishment, I had one of the most magical moments of my life. I look up, hear my name being called, and lo and behold, my mother was right there waiting for me with the biggest smile. How in the world this tiny 5’2 woman managed to snake her way through thousands of people and find a spot directly in front of the castle, as it was lit up, AND the sun was rising so perfectly is still something that blows my mind to this day?! I was overwhelmed with happiness sharing that moment with my mom and still look back on it and feel so emotional knowing she was there for me despite the cold and early morning wake up call. I was immersed in a place that allowed me to create magical memories with my mom, where anything was truly possible.

From that moment forward, and every time since, Disney has never failed to sprinkle its magic pixie dust on me every time I stop by for a visit. From the smallest gestures such as greeting me with a, “Good Morning Princess” while checking my bags before entering the park, to the nighttime Magic Kingdom fireworks display, I always find something to smile about. Every cast member you encounter makes sure you feel acknowledged and important, and surprises are hidden around every corner if you look close enough. In this world, age is irrelevant and the only requirement for enjoyment is having an open mind and heart. I can honesty say that from observation and through my own personal experience, the adults in Disney are having just as much, if not more, fun than the children who accompany them. Playing, regardless of your age, is therapeutic, and what better place to do this at than “The Happiest Place on Earth”, where you are safe and free to release your inner child without criticism from the outside world?

For me, going to Disney allows me to reset and give myself the ability to refill with joy. Much of my work requires me to give all of myself to my patients and their families for 12 hours at a time. In these 12 hours, I treat each and every patient and family member I encounter as though they are the most important person in the world because their world is often turned completely upside down while being in the hospital. Simple gestures such as offering to make a tired mother a cup of coffee, or giving someone my full and undivided attention while they tell me more about their loved one are ways I show my families that I am 1000% dedicated to them and that they can feel safe with me. Although I love what I do and would not change it for anything, working in an ICU is demanding physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. While I try to find light and hope in each shift, there unfortunately are days where patient outcomes won’t be ideal, regardless of the positivity I strive to reverberate. When I enter the World of Disney, I know that I am able to sit back and enjoy being a guest, treated with love the same way I treat my families. I am safe in this world, sans adult responsibility, able to be silly and filled with childlike wonder. I can dance, sing,  laugh, and honor my truest self (Also calories are negative here and no one judges for eating dessert with every single meal!). Every time I visit I always seem to find something new to love and appreciate, even if it’s just seeing other’s light up with joy, experiencing it for themselves. Over the years I’ve witnessed beautiful moments such as children seeing the castle for the first time, multi-generational families spending time together, and even a few engagements. I’ve had the opportunity and honor to send several families here through the Make A Wish Foundation, knowing that this week will truly be a once in a lifetime for them, hoping they create memories just as happy as I have. In these moments, I am truly thankful that Walt Disney created this world of possibility and that I have the opportunity to share in it’s magic and experience it with others.

For me, Disney is much more than my “happy place”; it’s a lifestyle that I choose to emulate both personally and professionally. By regularly releasing my inner child and allowing myself to refuel with joy, I am then able to take this happiness and give it to others freely, creating a positive feedback loop. Through the power of imagination and play, I am able to connect to my kiddos and their families, bringing a sense of fun and familiarity to an otherwise scary and traumatizing experience. And quite frankly, if being happy and believing in fairy dust and magic is wrong, I never want to be right! I understand that some people will never completely understand me or my affinity for Disney. But guess what, that’s completely fine with me and I’m not asking or expecting them to. Heck, I didn’t understand it a couple of years ago either, but look at me now! Three years and a couple of pairs of mouse ears later, I’m happily planning my sixth “Adulting” trip to Disney in the fall, with no intention of stopping anytime soon.

Regardless of your feelings towards “The Happiest Place on Earth” or you likelihood to take a trip down south to visit my main squeeze Mickey Mouse, I encourage everyone to listen to and honor their inner child every so often. Even if it’s as simple as turning on an old school throwback song or allowing yourself to be silly for a few seconds of the day, you’ll be amazed how good the soul feels after having a little bit of fun. For those reading this who are inspired to check out Disney for yourself, always know you have a gal willing to accompany you or assist you on your journey with tips and recommendations. I promise you won’t regret it, and you may even find this to be a “happy place” as well. As for me, I’m quite content in my Disney sweatshirt and Cinderella socks, knowing that tomorrow I have the opportunity to spread a little bit of magic to the kids I am assigned to. After all, someone needs to care for them; it might as well be one of the biggest kids of all ❤

With faith, trust, and little bit of Pixie Dust,

Emily